My 4 year old is worried. His 5th birthday is in slightly less than four months time and his mother has done NO PLANNING AT ALL.
Apparently, he would like to go to the monkey sanctuary we went to last Summer. This one is going to be tricky given that it is in the Poitou-Charentes region of France and we live in England. Fail number one. So I offer him the chance to go to another zoo with monkeys.
T: No, mum it won’t be the right kind of monkeys. And I can’t have balloons! (wails)
Okaaay I think, I’m losing the thread here.
Me: You can have balloons at home.
T: No, because they won’t be the right balloons and they won’t be the same kind of monkeys! You need to get the cards out mum. Or NO-ONE is going to come! (I’m sorry, is this a wedding? Have I missed the fact this has been advertised in Tatler?)
Me: Shush T, just think of the Chima lego and the Ninja turtle things you’re going to get. Don’t worry about your birthday, it is a long time away.
T: But I don’t know, I haven’t seen the presents yet! (Er, no.)
T: (goes for complete change of tack) I want to go to Jambinos.
This is a soft play centre and if you’ve read my previous post on the subject, you know what I think about those. Easy win though I think.
Me: Ok, that’s fine, we can go there.
T: But last time, I got lost in the balls and I couldn’t find my way out! (becoming increasingly high pitched again)
Finally, the penny dropped. Did I mention it was bedtime? I gave in and called in the big guns. Dad.
I’m 40, this is my last child and I still don’t always realise when they’re playing me like a violin.